Michael Szarowicz

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Mustache Name: My Third Brow
Age: 32
What is Your Hometown?: Buffalo, NY
Mustache Inspiration: There are several sources of inspiration I draw from when I grow My Third Brow. 1. Maynard James Keenan. "Rising up and wiping the webs and dew from my withered eye". 2. Borat. 'nough said. 3. All those 50+ year old females who were so supportive last year. You asked me to keep it....well now it's back! 4. Most importantly....my wife makes me do it.
Number of Mustaches Grown: 1
Hobbies: Ice hockey, golf, running, imagining myself as a musician. Mustache related costumes.
Does your significant other like your mustache?: She fakes it. She's in it for the money.
My mustache makes me look like...: A popular television personality from Kazakhstan who is married to Oxana and comes to the "U.S. and A" with his pet chicken Buh-Kaw.
What would you consider to be the optimal accessory for your Mustache?: A shoulder hung lime green g-string.
Jason Giambi: Steroid-freak, yet friend of the Mustache. Are you conflicted?: See rules and regulations...steriods are a no-no
In what setting will you be / are you most proud of your mustache?: At the mustache olympics.
Mustaches and Full-size vans: Creepy, or poised to make a come-back?: CREEPY
With a looming financial crisis, how do you anticipate your mustache making a difference (in a macro-economic sense)?: I'll likely lose my job. That'll open up a job for someone who may have lost theirs. Given recent trends, I think net zero job growth due to my mustache has to be seen as a win.